Girly Stuff/Only Her Hairdresser Knows Fer Shure
Since our parakeet died, I am the only male in my household. My wife is female (which means I have something in common with Rosie, who will turn up again later in this entry), my daughter is female, our exchange student is female, our Sheltie is female, and even our most recent visitor (a former exchange student) is female.
Perhaps that makes me overly sensitive at times.
Anomalous Noodge posted an entry on her blog on Monday with the title "Watch Out, I'm About To Get Girly On Your Ass." So I was adequately warned. I then proceeded to read about a visit to Bath & Body Works (which I also visit) to buy some Black Raspberry Vanilla scent (which I definitely DON'T use). She then talked about baskets and flowers - and although the store was NOT a girly store, we were definitely in girly territory in this post. Even the one chance at testosterone (a driveway that can't be shoveled) didn't result in any spectacular car crashes...just cars getting stuck.
I done responded:
Well, you warned us.
To make the post more appealing to the male gender, perhaps you could have described a wild careening car in (and out of) your driveway. Just as long as it's someone else's car, not yours.
However, I must admit to having some stuff from Bath & Body Works...but it's not raspberry vanilla...it's tree stuff.
Well, I want to go on the record right now and say that Anomalous Noodge is definitely a giver. In her next girly post, she also included a link to "We-Man!'s Funny Things To Do With Your Microwave Oven Page." The introduction says it all:
Warning:Everything on this page was actually tested in my own microwave oven and I encountered no dangerous situations. But... I make no guarantees what so ever for your experiments !!! Everything you experiment is at your own risk !!!
Never misabuse your oven for these experiments for more than 10-20 seconds. After these 10-20 seconds you must let your oven cool down for a few minutes !!!
We-Man! then provides pictures of all sorts of things in a microwave oven, including a CD, a burning tooth pick, a light bulb, plus all sorts of other stuff to boot. (Hey...)
All I can say is...kewl.
P.S. Speaking of car crashes:
Actress Zsa Zsa Gabor...has settled her lawsuit against the driver in a car crash that left her with serious injuries.
Gabor, who is 88, and her husband will get a total of $2 million in damages.
Gabor was a passenger in the front seat of a car that hit a light pole on the Sunset Strip in West Hollywood in November of 2002.
The car was driven by her hairdresser, Jaren Millard, who suffered minor injuries.
Gabor had broken bones and needed stitches in her head, hands, arms and legs.
She spent several months recovering from her injuries before returning to her home last year.
Gabor's husband, Frederic von Anhalt, sued for loss of companionship and will get $250,000.
And, to tie everything together, Rosie O'Donnell is tangentially involved in the Jaren Millard story:
"If there really is a Santa Claus, it's Rosie," says grateful Jaren Millard, 57, a Hollywood hairdresser and makeup artist whose living expenses were generously paid by the former talk show queen when he became so ill he couldn't work.
"Not only did Rosie pay my medical bills, but after I was released from the hospital -- and had no place to go -- she flew me in her own private jet to her Florida home and provided for my round-the-clock nursing care," he told The ENQUIRER.
"Until the time I was back on my feet and able to care for myself, she continued to help me. If not for her, I would've been out on the streets or in a shelter...."
Millard -- who was in the news recently for being in a car crash with Zsa Zsa Gabor -- said what makes O'Donnell's help so special is that it comes from the heart and is given with genuine love.
"Lots of stars are happy to lend their name to or donate money to a cause. They're happy to have the press coverage, but most don't want to become personally involved.
"Rosie is not like that. She not only gives the money directly, she also stays in constant touch with you, wanting to know how you are doing. She really cares and doesn't ask for anything in return."
The funnylady came to Millard's rescue on several occasions -- and he says she even saved his life.
When he was recuperating from pneumonia in 1997, she flew him from Hollywood to her Miami home where she provided him with skilled round-the-clock nursing care until he could get back on his feet.
Although now I'm wondering - am I correct in assuming that Millard's auto insurance company got stuck with the settlement?
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