Dooce and Cruising
Back when Dooce blogged about her work, she also blogged about today's Niacin poster boy, Tom Cruise:
On my commute home from work yesterday evening, I found myself involved in a conversation about masturbation and sexual awareness with a male co-worker....
"There I was at 9 years old closing my eyes and pretending that I was Apollonia.”
Unamused and barely stirred he offered, “Purple Rain was filmed entirely in Minneapolis. I’m from Minneapolis.”
“I mean, from all the memories I have of 4th grade, this one is the most vivid. And now whenever I hear that soundtrack I feel an overwhelming sense of innocence. Ironic, don’t you think?”
“Sometimes it gets really cold in Minneapolis,” he said, completely ignoring me.
“I think the next milestone in my sexual awakening would have to have been the sex scene between Tom Cruise and Kelly McGillis in Top Gun. That Berlin song, so delicate and appropriate for that scene with the curtains flowing and light shimmering and the tongues and the necks, still makes me eager to fuck a man a military uniform.”
“Tom Cruise is gay.”
“Do you have to rain on my sexual awakening parade?”
“It rains a lot in Minneapolis.”
I'll probably be in the Minneapolis area on August 13. I'll let you know if it rains. Or if I see some short guy on a street corner.
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