Don't Read What It Says
I've seen billboards for ready.gov, so I finally checked it out.

Under "Make a Kit," it lists the following links:

Water & Food

Clean Air

First Aid Kit

Supply Checklists

Special Needs Items

So, are we supposed to make a kit of clean air? Buy an oxygen tank?

It gets better. Although the site basically admits that you can't protect yourself against all airborne WMDs (while noting that "something over your nose and mouth in an emergency is better than nothing"), the suggestions are bound to incite ridicule.

Other Barriers

Heavyweight plastic garbage bags or plastic sheeting

Duct tape

Scissors

I can't wait for the filmed instructions. (more) (still more) (even more)