Hello...Hello!

May 13, 2006

We've recently been talking about songs that get stuck in your head. And here's the one that's been stuck in my head since last night:

Hello
Hello
Fox Football Friday!

Imagine it sung in English (rather than American) and performed over a modern-day equivalent of fun English punk muzak. I forget the name of the group that sings it (238 or 279 or something like that), but they're clearly going for the corporate oi.

Fox Football Friday's last show for the EPL season ended last night. The show is hosted by Nick Geber and Steven Cohen, and primarily consists of callers who give their pitch (heh) in twenty seconds or less. The show has unfortunately borrowed the worst element of television's version of "Loveline" - Nick and Steven are in the front of a fake bar where people are carrying on and ignoring the cameras in front of them.

But the Fox Football Friday theme song singers aren't the only ones trying to bring back the seventies. Virgin Atlantic is airing a radio commercial with Steve Jones or Paul Cook or someone like that in which the featured ex-Sex Pistol actually says that taking a taxi from Heathrow is "for wankers." Even if you're paid to do so, does anyone use the term "wankers" in 2006?

I guess so:

Cisse is a wanker who should spend more time on his game than his stupid hair and stupid yellow boots and stupid leopard print underwear.

I’m sure someone humorless wanker’s going to blow a gasket as we grossly violate whatever uniform policy is in effect, but in some cases, there’s safety in numbers.

This raises a question. Remember when I proudly wrote a script which prominently used the non-trendy word "egads"? Well, people still use that term also:

Note to self: place drug order through semaphore, smoke signals, tin cans tied with string, or other non-phone device. This news of course, comes less than a year after Yahoo! gave away everyone's search information without a warrant and without telling anyone. Then Google fought it, but basically did the same thing. Egads, I can remember when other countries were jealous of all the rights we Americans enjoy. Or maybe they weren't.

Well, this un-American person is obviously a Communist and doesn't count. (Yes, I'm joking, and yes, I'm very well aware that this is a critical dividing line between conservatives, who respect the rights and freedoms of the individual, and neo-conservatives, who don't.) But is anyone else using the term?

I've been spending too much on ebay, but egads! I'm trying to find S&H, or figure out if it's already calculated into the price, because I've got no problem spending twelve bucks on such a sweet-ass bag, but it's shipping from vietnam or something, so that can get pricey.

Well, I can't fault this person, because your favorite Emperor just got an Ebay account a week ago and made a purchase. Luckily, this item was shipped from Texas, which is miles and miles from Vietnam. (Yes, I'm still trying to get the Finland hits.)

To that end, I'll tell you what I just learned. I can't tell you how I learned it, but trust me on this one. One of Kiira Korpi's favorite (or, for you English types, favourite) shows is "The OC."

"The OC."

For the record, I have never seen "The OC," but I understand that from the OC viewpoint, I live in the sixth level of Hell...the 909. Hello, Sbarro bombers (heh).