WHY YOU SHOULD NOT POST IN ALL CAPS
Please, please, don't post in all caps. You'd think that this was the highlight of David's life:
I WAS ON THE AIR WITH ANDREW SICILIANO HOST OF FOX SPORTS RADIOS THE DRIVE I TALKED ABOUT THE CLEVELAND INDIANS AND THE NEW YORK GIANTS TOO TEAMS THAT ARE NEAR AND DEAR TO MY HEART AND WHEN I GET MARRIED THOSE ARE THE TEAMS MY WIFE WILL HAVE TO LIKE TO.
Must like Indians and Giants? Some of the real personals are funny enough. These personals, by the way, are from the state of Oregon, which explains everything about them.
Youthful fairy woman of royal blood, 63 y.o. 5'4", 120 lbs, ISO male sprite of similar age with nobility of heart and mind for long term companionship and the practice of radiant being. VM# 5733
Petite, Earthly-spiritual, SPF ISO SPM 38-52, slow progression to LTR, friends first-hiking, bicycling, coast, Bijou, music, dancing. What do you think it takes to develop and maintain a LTR? Write Blind Box 'Earthly'
33 y.o. large and lovely Goddess and mom of 2 seeks humorous God between 27-50 who's liberal to enjoy movies, poetry, live music and more. NS, ND. Herb friendly. Friends first. VM# 5715
Virgo seeks Capricorn (20s). Painter, poet, musician. Alchemist caught between two worlds. 34, but not hideous. Can cook, dance. Loves love. Wants kids, farm. What can I do for you. VM# 5795
SUBMISSIVE WOMAN WANTED
Not seeking cook or maid. Me: attractive SWM, 6', nicely-built, nonbalding dark hair, financially independent, health conscious, nonsmoker, experienced, safe, gentle, creative, good conversationalist. You: feminine, sensuous, healthy, childless SWF, interested in psychological exploration. Write "Resident", POB 25160, Portland, 97298. Please include phone. VM# 5466
Completely unrelated fun fact:
Hillary Clinton was on the board of Wal-Mart for six years!
Comments
And the Goddess shouldn’t have any trouble finding a man who thinks he is God.
When I read the "Resident" entry, I checked the zip code to make sure it didn't correspond to a jail or prison.
More about personals in a bit.