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Monday, September 25, 2006

Next, Oprah fans viciously attack any lawyer they see 

The minions who do Oprah's bidding have created a public relations nightmare for her:

Oprah Winfrey says her lawyers shouldn't have gone after the man who is trying to promote her as a candidate for president.

Not because she's running, mind you.

"I feel flattered by it," the 52-year-old talk-show host told The Associated Press on Monday. "My lawyers overreacted, I think, by sending him a cease-and-desist order because it really is a flattering thing."

It should have been handled in a phone call, said Winfrey, who said she's thinking of calling Patrick Crowe of Kansas City, Mo., herself.

Crowe has been campaigning to urge Winfrey to run for president for years, setting up a Web site that has its own campaign song. A month ago, Winfrey's lawyers sent Crowe a letter demanding that he remove her picture from his Web site.

Winfrey's smiling face remained on http://www.oprah08.net Monday.

Now we have to wonder what will happen next. Oprah has said that her lawyers "overreacted." Will the followers of Oprah now wage war against any overreacting lawyer? Will Oprah devotees crowd outside attorney's offices, yelling, "Don't overreact!"? (Yes, I appreciate the irony.)

But now we should probably question the sanity of Patrick Crowe. I can't see Oprah working with a Congress or a Supreme Court. But Patrick Crowe sees something. This is what he says:

The citizens of the State of Minnesota showed a new way when they elected Jesse Ventura governor as a candidate of the Reform Party. They demonstrated that not only can ordinary citizens become elected officials, but that they can govern as well.

First off, Jesse Ventura wasn't an ordinary citizen. Jesse Ventura was a talented entertainer and a forceful public speaker.

Second off, was he a good governor? While I for one would love to see all of the incumbents get wiped out of the governmental halls, it's not enough to elect a single reform candidate. You have to elect them in multiple positions. As Wikipedia notes, Ventura had no political base in the legislature, and his vetoes were often overridden. You can't be effective if you can't substantiate your position.

So, back to Oprah:

Oprah Winfrey is famous, scrupulously honest, immensely popular and wealthy in her own right. While she has scant experience in politics, this is hardly a handicap in a world where most people have become disillusioned with "conventional" politics. She knows how to run a large and complex organization...like the one she has put together for her talk show, the Angel network and her book club. Furthermore, she has the additional advantage of being the first woman, non-white, non-politician to not only seek this high office, but who also has a credible chance of succeeding and leading our great nation into a new era of peace and prosperity.

As I noted above, Oprah's ability to run a large and complex organization is NOT directly transferable to running the United States government. Congress and the Supreme Court are not going to bend over backward and do her bidding, and even the executive branch is not going to Oprah-ize themselves overnight.

Oprah's only hope as President would be to model herself upon Andrew Jackson.

Jackson's Bank War and its populistic, egalitarian rhetoric shaped the platform and rhetoric of his new Democratic party....By casting himself as the people's tribune against the moneyed elite and their tools in government, he introduced an enduring theme in American politics.

But let's say, for example, that some state passed some law that Oprah didn't like. Sure, she could get air time and deliver an impassioned speech from the East Wing of the White House, an adoring crowd cheering at every word. But would that sufficiently produce a groundswell of change? Probably not.

Mr. Crowe, your proposed plan will only work if you can recruit thousands of people to run for the House, the Senate, the state legislatures, the governorships, and all the city and county positions. And all of these candidates must agree to the following platform:

In my elected position, I will do whatever Oprah tells me to do.

If Oprah, and these thousands of candidates, are elected, then Patrick Crowe's vision of an Oprah-led nation will become a reality.

And maybe we'll all get brand new cars in the bargain.

From the Ontario Empoblog (Latest OVVA news here)

Quite frankly, I think she's more qualified than most of the yo-yos in Congress, and certainly more so than the current occupant of the Oval Office. Geez, did I say that? Need coffee. Anyhoo...
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